Open Letter From a Mother of a Living Kidney Donor:
Dear Loved One of a Potential Living Kidney Donor: When my daughter announced she wanted to donate a kidney to a stranger, of course I was concerned. Yet I wasn’t as concerned about the surgical outcome as I was for my daughter’s future. I thought what if she ever had kidney failure herself? I'm so proud of my daughter's living kidney donation. It pleases me to hear her say that the privilege of donation was the most rewarding thing she’s ever done - by far. What’s even more amazing is that she continues to tell the world: If she could do it again, she would! Diane
I am a mother of an adult child who donated a kidney to a stranger. At first, I struggled over my daughter’s decision. Mothers are supposed to protect their daughters and keep them out of harms way, right? I now realize that I could have benefited greatly from another mother’s perspective, since these emotions were so foreign to me at the time. In the spirit of sharing my journey to help empower other mothers, I write this open letter.
While I’ve always trusted my daughter's judgment, I couldn’t help but ask if she was sure this was something she really wanted to do.
She assured us that she researched the process diligently, and that she was 100% confident about her decision. She consistently expressed her passion for what she believed was a calling to serve. She also shared the details of the procedure highlighting the safeguards that were in place to protect living kidney donors.
My daughter conveyed a tremendous amount of faith in her medical team, which put my mind at ease. Yet, the real turning point for me occurred when I shifted my focus to my belief in the Golden Rule.
I simply put myself in the place of the parent with a loved one in need.
I thought, How horrible it would be to be waiting for others to die so your child's name could work their way up to the top of the list.
And then I asked myself, How could I stand in the way of my daughter’s calling to save someone’s life. Her gift could end the life-threatening wait for someone right now.
I surely wouldn’t want anyone to stand in the way of my child receiving such a gift, so how could I stand in the way of another mother’s child?
I am deeply moved by the spirit of her kindness, and equally
A Sister's Reaction:
As a sister I was concerned, very concerned, but not so much about something going wrong during the surgery for my sister. I was more concerned about something going wrong for the recipient afterward—like organ rejection or, worse, death.
My sister was well aware of what she was doing. She has such a big heart, and I knew her resolve to help others was unyielding. Yet I found myself worried about the emotional toll this procedure could have on her if things didn't work out as perfectly as planned.
At first, I found myself hoping she wouldn’t pass the donor qualification tests. That way, her valiant gesture could be just that—a valiant gesture and nothing more.
Yet, when I learned she passed all the tests, I sensed that her faith in this process was indeed part of a higher calling.
And while admittedly I don’t see myself stepping forward in the same way—because of her, I now support the process with far greater understanding and admiration. I'm in awe of my sister’s remarkable ability to throw some good out into the world. Her champion spirit continues to shine in the light of her own goodness.
It is my sincere hope that her living kidney donation will inspire many more good-hearted people to follow her lead.
Tracy
Kansas City
DONOR INTERVIEWS:
Click On Photo: Listen To Living Kidney Donors Share Their Joyful Experiences.
